dating my life by moving

The last year has well being all a move. I moved to Walton the job fell though after 5 months. They got a website and I have get to even get a reckmendation. No 3d modeling no Fish models. So I move all my stuff home to a place I havent lived in 3 years. Its liveable but my apartment is shoved in one room and I have no room cant even have a desk of my own. To add I havent lived with my parent in a while and they still think I am 5 years old. only being here 2 or so weeks. It feels to long. Thinking i am going to move to the UK soon if I can get to Coventry for there product design program. No one will look at my work cause my degree isnt what they want. Being doing a lot of drawing trying to get bettter. Havent being able to do much 3d modeling cause I dont own the software or a good enough computer to run it. So I have lots of designs done but i cant make the next step. To add trying to get a good night sleep is killing me. I keep having horable nightmares about friends or I guess they would be people now from high school. Its like living here breeds bad karma. I spend a lot of time in kingston and well I like it there better cause well I cant run into any one and the people there care what happens to me. Its lonely up here. I have a few friends that are still around up here but they were people I didnt even really know in high school. It odd I guess that they became the people I spend the most time with. Hopeful I wont get rejected to Coventry I dont know how much rejection I can take. I dont know how much more moving I can deal with. Then think i am strong and driven but I just want to hide. I am nothing that I want to be. Hopefully the reworking of myself will do something in the long run. I guess this isnt to much a bitch post more a I am lost and tired one.
Oh added some work I did cause well not like I am dont much else.